Under The Berkeley Skies-Day 24: Badassery!

I have a major confession. Ready? I’m seriously addicted to “Sons of Anarchy” and as if that’s not bad enough, seriously jonesing for Charlie’s character (yea, we’re tight, we’re on first name basis. Don’t hate it’s an ugly color on you!), Jax.

I watched an episode during my lunch and three or four more when I came home.

Serious problem.

But let’s talk about Jackson, I really like his character: sexy, I wouldn’t mind taking a body shot off of him. Plus, he has that I’m bad ass but still a genuinely nice guy thing going. Oh, and let’s not forget his ‘make your panties drop in a second’ smile mixed in with ‘I’ll kill you in a heartbeat if you mess with my family thing’. Sigh…I know he’s not real, but Charlie is. Yummm, we can role play!

For any of you psych majors out there, does this mean I have ‘issues?” Or is it normal to not be able to keep it in your pants around a sexy bad ass? I’m with the latter.

There’s something about guys like this character that I simply find appealing. I’ve dated a few bad ass’ in my lifetime, not SOA material, nonetheless the kind you don’t bring home to meet your mother. I knew it wasn’t going anywhere it was just fun. But I guess that’s the turn off about it too, you can’t really be “serious” with a person like that or can you?

The guys that I have taken seriously, have the potential to be bad ass or might have been in their younger days. No, honey I don’t make this a requirement, it just sort of happens that way. I remember one time my friend said: “Mon likes their cockiness she confuses it for high self esteem,” when my friend said this she was talking about Marines. I have an ex that’s a Marine, and before I met him I had gone out a few times with two other marines. Hmmm, I maybe should’ve gone to a different bar at one point or another. Live and learn, I guess.

Anyway, you can come to your own conclusion about that comment, but I will say there’s an ounce of truth in it. I do like cocky guys, for some reason I’m attracted to them. Maybe it’s because I’m cocky? What? I know I am. I like them to be cocky to a certain point, I like them to be assertive and strong willed. I have an extremely strong character, I can smell bullshit from a mile away, and I know what I want both in and out of the bedroom, and I’m not afraid to speak my mind! Now, there’s a lot of men out there that claim to be okay with this, shit, they say that’s what they want. But in reality, they might not know how to deal with it. I’ve gotten that; thus, I’m speaking from experience.

The marine that turned into a boyfriend, some of you might know who I’m talking about, I’ll call him Pinky. That’s actually what I did call him, I was Brain. I’m not going to bother explaining that, Google it. Now, before I go on into our not so epic love story, you know this guy was sure of himself if he let a girl call him “Pinky.”

Anyway, Pinky was a Sarge in the Marines, did some special missions. Served in the first Iraq war, got shot and hurt his back pretty bad. Other than being a biker, I have a soft spot for them, he was not the type of guy I was into. So I thought. It pains me to say this, but when I met him, I was trying to go for the brother, but Pinky was on me like white on rice. I”ll never forget his line: “Let me save your number now before I get too drunk and forget to ask you for it.” For some reason that line, did it for me.

I remember our first date, we went to TGIFriday’s, I was actually getting ready to leave on a two week trip to the East Coast to visit my sisters. I remember we talked for hours, I threw stuff at him and he jumped back. Nothing phased him, he had seen it all and he didn’t take anything too serious. He know who he was and his proudest accomplishment was his daughter. He told me up front that he had a daughter and if I had a problem with that we should go ahead and ask for the check now. Yup, I was hooked at that point.

He met my family and friends, he felt extremely comfortable meeting my people. He had that assertiveness about him. That self-assurance that just drove me nuts. He didn’t feel threatened around other people.  He made some killer eggs and always had a smile on his face, but I also knew he was capable of hurting anyone that hurt someone he loved. I think we all are to a certain point, but when shit hits the fan, how many of us will just point and how many of us will actually pull the trigger? He would pull the trigger.

Oh yea, he was also in a bike club, so you tie that in with the Marines, loyalty is key. He was the first and so far the only guy, I’ve actually felt safe with.  There were moments of tension;  you get a little nervous when other bike crews show up and your guy is wearing his club gear.

He wasn’t a biker like my Jax, his was a sport bike; however, I have dated a Harley biker before, also a Marine. I did tell you I had a thing for Marines right? Again, I don’t scope them out, it just always happens that way.

Unfortunately, our relationship didn’t work out because we got too heavy too soon, he was not ready for it. But we do keep in touch, he’s a good guy. I don’t think I would date him now, but I’ll always consider him a friend.

Now let’s study another test case, when I was in school I dated a fellow classmate. He was older than I was by just a couple of years, extremely brilliant. I mean the guy was disgustingly intelligent. He was cocky about it too, but not too much. He was sure about his brains, but not so much on everything else. He wasn’t the best looking guy I dated, I’m being honest, but what got me was the grey matter. I remember there were times when he would try to share his past; how he was a punk rocker, had a mohawk, did drugs, and got into fights, etc. It turned me off. Why? Because I didn’t buy it, I think he was trying to be something he wasn’t.

I think he was trying to be something he thought I wanted. He’s a nerd, full blown nerd with the big glasses and tight jeans. I was okay with that, I don’t know why he wasn’t. I’m tough, some might say I’m from the other side of the tracks, I have streets smarts, because I learned the hard way or by others mistakes. So, I think he was trying to build himself up to be like me. He was a good guy, not a bad ass, I was okay with that or so I thought I could be okay with it.

Apparently, he was trying to convert himself into something that he thought I wanted, that’s not the way it works. Of course, this didn’t work out. The fact that he was cocky about his intelligence drew me in, but knowing that’s as far as it went turned me off. I didn’t argue with him, when we had the “talk” it was a matter of time.

I’m not looking to be anyone’s “old lady” but I do want to be with someone that is capable of some bad-assery. I want to feel safe when I’m with him and not just because he’s a good driver. I want to make sure that if the zombie apocalypse ever came, he would kill his best friend if he was a walker, but yet be manly enough to have a tea party and play princess with our daughter (my first child will be a girl, so that’s how I know me and my soon-to-be husband will have a daughter). That’s what I’m looking for, that’s the kind of ‘bad ass’ I’m looking for; consequently, I can deal  if he happens to come with a bike.

I remember that was one of the many things I liked about the Professor, he had that “RRRRrrrr” (you have to say this in a tough-thug-like tone) about him. Dammit did the man not look sexy in a suit, he was as sweet as can be, the sexiest smile you’ll ever see, incredibly intelligent, and he had some ‘street’ in him. That made him even yummier! It just so happens, I was right.

Now don’t go thinking: “Damn, this chick is gangster!” I’m not, far from it. I’m not looking for a thug or a gangster. I hate guys that start fights, but I wouldn’t mind one who would be willing to fight if the cause was right. I’m not looking for someone that’s trigger happy, just happy but not scared to pull that trigger if the walkers are approaching. He better pull that trigger, even if it is his momma! Zombies are not your friends folks. 

There’s this other character on there, Juice. He’s a fine looking brother, tough, but not so bright. Other than being cute, not my type. See where I’m going with this?

I think at the end of the day we all want our guys to have a little bad ass in them. What? Not you? Oh, you’re waiting for your knight in shining armor. Sorry to break it to you hun, but you do know the knight has to kick some ass in order to rescue the damsel in distress right?

I’m pretty darn bad ass, let’s keep it real. I can be a straight dick at times and if someone messes with the people I love-it’s on. Not sure what “on” means I’ve never had to turn it “on” but just the threat of turning it “on” has been enough for people to steer clear. Since, I’m bad ass it makes perfect sense for me to be with a bad ass.  Prefereably a sexy and intelligent bad ass!

Some of my favorite Bad Asses:

Night my dears! Enough rambling for tonight. We really need to start talking more about you. Maybe next blog!